Guys Listen Up…

I have been anticipating this my whole life as a mom of four girls; however,  I didn’t realize it would be like this…the day has finally arrived when my eldest daughter who’s in college gets to have her first formal male/guy/boy visitor at home…on valentines day.

Let me tell you what went wrong with the visit.

First,  it was unannounced. By this I mean he did not ask my daughter’s permission that he will come over.

      Tsk….tsk…tsk…Wrong move. She was too busy to even consider a visitor much more entertain someone who just came in crashing.

Second, he came along with some bunch of “bodyguards” (friends actually,  one being a cousin to my daughter).

         Tsk…tsk…Tsk…Another wrong move. For someone strong, intelligent, and driven college student like my daughter (modesty aside) .. it was a turn-off.

Third, he came in prepared for a solo original performance of his life. Yes…you guessed it right. He serenaded my daughter with an original composition. It was sweet and nice and romantic…but again…tsk…tsk…tsk..another wrong move.

          He scared her with him over the top romantic gesture. For a first time visit…I personally believed it was a bad idea..although in fairness he sang really well and the lyrics weren’t even also bad.

Fourth, he was too prepared; and his actions were too choreographed.

         Well, I am sure you will all agree with me if I say it is more comfortable to loosen up and just allow things to happen naturally.

Fifth, he came in with traditional roses, chocolates, and..necklace…

          The first two items I might consider. ..the third. .I don’t understand… Okay, I might be just too pathetic about the whole thing but come was like ahhhhhh…

Lastly, and I think the gravest of all the wrong moves…he came in with a dedication written in the card that has been generically used by every boy on earth.

          Here’s what it says: “roses are red, this ink is blue; a girl stole my heart, I’m glad it’s you”………

Now guys…boys…men… tell me…

Isn’t it just right to ask for permission when you visit a girl’s house? (Where is your courtesy?)

Isn’t it a sign of uncertainty to come over with a “bodyguard”? (What are you scared of?)

Isn’t it too “loud” to perform solo on a first visit? (Why show off when you can play it cool?)

Isn’t it awkward to come in prepared with all your “choreography? “(Haven’t you heard of “be cool”?)

Isn’t it scary to give valuable gifts on a first visit?  (What happens if you get busted, will you take it back or will the girl be obliged to give it back?)

And lastly, isn’t it pathetic to make use of a generic dedication that I bet have been used for generations? ( don’t you think its nice to write what’s in your heart?)

Well. .that’s just me…what he did might be fine with others but judging on my experiences and hearing from my friends. ..those were a “”.

Nevertheless, I wanted to say that I think that boy is really nice and intelligent (am sure of this one). …he just needs to restructure his moves next time…

The gifts....I didn't get a photograph of the chocolates;  one of my other daughters ate ot immediately after the boy left. Well what to do....It looked delicious,  she said..
The gifts…I didn’t get a photograph of the chocolates; one of my other daughters ate it immediately after the boy left.
Well, what to do…It looked delicious, she said…


The happy valentines banner my daughters made for me. Each hanging hearts contains a special love message
The happy Valentine banner my daughters made for me. Each hanging hearts contains a special love message

It’s February 15…a day after Valentine’s Day…and well..again just like yesterday when I thought it would be another ordinary day…I was wrong…again I woke up with my girls running around with a personalized banner.

Let me tell you what each heart says…

…I believe in love at first sight; I love my mom the first time I opened my eyes.

…others don’t believe in heroes; they haven’t met my dad.

…”dad, I may find my prince; but you will always be my king.”

…a daughter needs a dad to stand by her the day she marries;  to love her even if she fails; to comfort her when the rain falls.


 age 10: “I love you”

 age 14: “my mom is so annoying”

age 18: ” I wanna leave the house”

age 25: ” Mom, you were right”

age 30: “Mom, forgive me”

age 50: ” I don’t wanna lose my mom”

age 70: ” I love my mom so much”

…love your mom, you’ll never get another…

Beautiful reasons to celebrate love… as simple as that…

The hanging hearts
The hanging hearts

Love (Start the Day Right)

The beautifully decorated white roses which woke me up in the morning
The beautifully decorated white roses which woke me up in the morning

Love is such a complicated issue…thing…topic..feeling….(we may refer it that way..) But just as I thought that this Love Day could just pass by like any other ordinary day… I was wrong…

I woke up with a knock at my door…it was my eldest daughter… I thought it was just one of those moments when she would ask me..what to wear…what’s for breakfast…will you drive me to school?…will you pick me up later?…..

As I opened the door. I got a big hug from her…with a huge bunch of white roses…ahhhh..its Valentine’s Day…

My three other girls came over…with a chorus..”start the day right”….”happy Valentine’s Day Mom”…

How on earth were they able to hide from me that bunch of roses? We live in the same house after all.. and it is so early to even run to a flower shop and buy…well..that’s LOVE….love in its most simple way…

This morning was a manifestation of the fact that LOVE can never really be complicated…my children made it easier for me…

They always amazed me with their “skills” in coming up with great surprises, and yes I was really of this writing I still can’t figure out how they kept that flower from me overnight…

Well… I guess I shouldn’t be worrying about it anymore…after all..when you love someone; you’ll find a way..and I suppose I witnessed that kind of love from my children…


Happy Valentine’s Day Everyone…

last year's Valentine's Day my kids gave me this
last year’s Valentine’s Day my kids gave me this
the poem my little girl wrote for me last year's Valentine's Day
the poem my little girl wrote for me last year’s Valentine’s Day

The Love Day


…two creatures bound to stay together …..for better or worse I suppose

I was able to recover something from my old (and I mean old dated 1992) files. A poem about love I once wrote. This is how it goes…


When you’re in love….mentally you go nuts

you think that the one you love is

the fairest creature in this universe,

the only person blessed on the earth;

you will say that there are millions

of other fishes in the seas,

but all these millions are worm – infested

and only your fish is a worm-free,

and yet for all you know he is not

even a fish, he is a worm.

You see him anywhere you go,

in any garden where flower blooms

even in a tree whose branches reach

majestically for the stars

and you hear him in every sound,

in the ringing of the telephone,

in the sad joyous refrain of a love song,

even in the silence of the church where

everybody’s head is bowed for meditation.

When you’re in love…emotionally,

this is worst.

for you are empty without him,

and complete with him.

your life finds meaning in his, and

therefore, his life is the only meaningful one.

with him beside you, the rose is redder

the birds chirpier, the grass greener,

the politicians funny, and God is

a very nice bearded old man.

And physically…what love can perform!

for some inexplicable reasons, his hands are

completely different from all the hands in the world.

they are the one electrically charged.

heaven is in the circle of his hands

and for all you know, it is insanity.

for what else is love but a form of insanity?

look at the other catastrophes that happen

to when you’re in love you become

unreasonably and insanely jealous.

When you are with him, one hour is just a seasoned

but when he is away, one hour is almost a year.

he might not be good looking but

you think he is.

You do not eat, but you are not hungry

you do not sleep but you feel good.

You have no money in the bank

but you strut as if you own the world

and worst of all, you are convinced

that you can live on love alone.



Wow…how wonderful….yes wonderful only if I am 16 years old ….but I am not anymore…..and judging on my experiences on love itself..tsk..tsk.tsk… I regret having written it… regret because it only showed how emotionally immature a 16-year-old could be no matter how smart she is…

The point is …February is supposed to be said the month of love…a moment to celebrate love…but I think we should also take a look at the reality of love itself…this is also the moment to celebrate love in its real sense:

love shouldn’t make you nuts;

it makes you think clearer.

love shouldn’t make you emotionally crazy;

it gives you emotional stability and security.

love definitely is not blind;

it makes you see things correctly.

Happy Valentine Everybody…May you all celebrate love …love in its truest sense…