If I am to live for another 45 years,
I’d spend it writing poetry about you
and let me start by saying
this brings me back to the day
I first met you
I was bewitched and totally beguiled by you
from that day on forward
I could never take away
your charm in my head
least I know
it has taken
not only of my mind
but of my heart
and my soul longs for you
for as magical
and whimsical as it is I was totally beguiled and bewitched by you
“not because you’re holding on to the light doesn’t mean you are out of the darkness.”
Because not all lights are bound to illuminate your way. Not all good is beautiful, and that not all beautiful is good as well. Just as how you thought you’ve made the best choices, made the best decisions, and made the best and smartest moves. And, then reality hits you – you were wrong. So wrong.
Regrets filled you in.
Sorrow captured your soul.
Despair engulfed your heart.
You were supposed to be in a top-notch condition by now. Given how smart you are. Given how talented you are. And given how kind of a person you are.
What happened? What went wrong?
You don’t need to answer. It’s enough to break my heart to see you like that.
“and when I cry, I cry not because of the pain I cry because of the many times I wish you were beside me.”
It has nothing to do with you, with what you did or did not do. It’s a cry of relief, a cry of sigh, and a cry of “coming home.”
It’s a cry for all the times I believed I was right (but was wrong). A cry for the many times I messed up (but you were never there to say “it’s ok”). A cry for the moments I was brave (but I was really scared). A cry for many occasions I was numbed (but feeling the pain). A cry for all the times I needed help (but you were not around).
It’s a cry for all of my successful events and milestones and for the many times I sure did good (you failed to witness). A cry for all the wonderful opportunities (you missed).
I cry my love because it feels so good to be home, in your loving arms.
they come in many forms for the little ones it could be the famous Casper, the friendly ghost for the adults and the believers of life after death it could be their friends or loved ones visiting them after deaths and for the joyful and adventurous ones it could be just another spooky Halloween tale but little do we know, or little do we recognize the ghost that truly haunts us down for some, it could be a childhood experience of losing a loved one early on in life for others, it could be a terrible heartbreak of losing “the love of your life” for the first time but for the silent majority it could be a one-time big-time trauma haunting them down as they sleep at night for years and years and years and that no matter what they do it keeps coming back as what most ghostly appearances do it appears anytime, anywhere uninvited, unsolicited more so, in the darkest hour of the night even in the silence of their dreams and in the comfort of their wildest, most brilliant creative imagination it appears
It wasn’t long ago that trick or treating was so much fun, where kids gather hanging around the streets with their specialized masks on creatively made by their doting moms for this occasion as their annoyed dads yelled over and complained of a burnt cupcake in the oven or a dish uncooked
“I tried so hard, and that’s the thing. Trying didn’t help so, I stopped. And it felt so good; missing you without trying not to.”
And all this time I thought I mastered the art of concealing, the art of hiding what I really feel. I thought I learned the tricks and trade of smiling even when it hurts, of smiling even when it pains, of smiling even when it sucks. But I guess I will never be able to learn and master how not to miss you.
I tried and tried really damn hard. But trying didn’t even ease a single hurt or a single pain. Trying didn’t even make me smile the way I do when I am with you.
The smiles they see my love are all just for the show. It’s nothing but a senseless, artificial smile hiding the reality, the truth, and the gravity of how my heart aches.
I don’t know why And I really don’t care why Some are quick to judge And driven by Wrong perceptions And unrealistic expectations When all that is needed is just One good heart to see and One good soul to feel What our naked eye cannot perceive