Love Liberates (after Maya Angelou)
if you need permission to go i set you free
i’m sorry it took me years to do it with glee
i’m sorry i didn’t dare to do it sooner
i’m sorry for losing you i couldn’t bear.
i am grateful for your love all through these years
i am grateful for the many chances and many tears
i am grateful for all the times you let me be
i am grateful for the moments you stayed with me.
i love you even if you are near or far
i love you even if you live elsewhere
i love you even if i don’t see you around
i love you even if i don’t hear your sound
i would love to have your arms around me
i would love to have your smile to see
i would love to have your hug to hold
i would love to have your hand to hold
but that is not possible for now
so if you need permission to go
i set you free, i let you go
you deserve it from me
some people need permission to go
and i did not give that to you
it took me decades to let you go
and now, it’s time for you to go
and i liberate you
from my love.
Maya Angelou has always been my favorite American poet and civil rights activist. Maya Angelou speaks about the power of love to liberate the human spirit. She speaks of how her mother’s love liberated her to become her fullest self and how Maya’s love liberated her mother at the end of her mother’s life.
And when i saw Sadje’s photo prompt today, i was reminded of my Papa. the boat is and has always been symbolic of the fact that i have had separation “problems” with my father ever since i was a kid. i hate to see him leave for long days of work. why the boat? because i grew up spending my summer vacations in Boracay with the rest of my siblings and my father. and the boat is the only means of transportation to go and leave the island. and at the end of our summer vacation, i could not even bear the idea of looking at the boat because it will signify us leaving the island.
when my father died years ago, i was devastated (i was already an adult when he died) for one, i didn’t get to see him before he died. and years after i still feel like a am still holding on to him. there are days when i had to blame him for not waiting for me. there are days when i wanted him so bad because i am in such a big mess.
and though, i grew up so sheltered my papa never doubted, that i could one day become a strong and independent woman. he never doubted my skills, my talents, and my dreams. his love made me the woman that i am now. his love liberated me from the traditional “papa’s girl” notion; that when you are one, you won’t be able to do things on your own.
it has been over a decade now since he passed away, and as father’s day is now approaching it is just fitting to honor him and his love and to finally let him go. liberate him; from me questioning why he didn’t give me the chance to at least say my final goodbye to him.
Happy Father’s Day Papa, i promise from now on i will be writing poems about you only to celebrate your love for me.
for Sadje’s WDYS