Home Soon

it was though just yesterday
when I used to hold your tiny hands
as we walked  down the stairs
oh, how you confidently
let go, while others cried in despair
for not wanting to

as days became weeks
and weeks became months
I barely noticed how years flew by
‘cos every moment with you
is a loving moment
of memories to keep
of how our world used to be
until the last days of my life

I never leave you behind
never alone
for you, I will adjust my world
reorganize my life
and dream the dreams
you dream

but my child,
our world has changed
and I have to leave you alone
my heart bleeds
and I am lost
lost of words

remember your dream is my dream
and your hope is my hope
for that, I will be home
soon…

 

 

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( For the visually challenged reader, the image shows an old bearded man standing on a stone staircase that is leading to a tower. In the background you can see mountains enshrouded in clouds)

https://lifeafter50forwomen.com/2020/07/13/what-do-you-see-38-13-july-2020/

Merry Christmas

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Merry Christmas everyone..it has been a wonderful blogging year for me thanks for all your support..

MALIGAYANG PASKO….

Christmas family puzzle

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as I was still cleaning up my table I saw this personalised Christmas puzzle gift made by my third daughter (the one who wrote lullaby…I posted weeks ago). she was 11 years when she made this. Each piece was a cartoon version of ourselves which she individually placed in an envelope and we too had to put them all together…

kids..you might wanna do this. so sweet ..

Mom n Dad

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one of the DIY cards made by my eldest daughter on her high school graduation which I happened to recover as I was cleaning up my old table.

her dad (my husband) is an engineer and it amazes me a lot at how much she can relate her dad’s profession as to being a father to her.

In the same way that I am a Language and Literature teacher….

This is just one of the many reasons why I am grateful to be her mom..20151218_163814

My Santa Claus

 

giant sock hanging at our window pane the night before  Christmas you asked me “please my little princess Santa’s coming I need your socks hanging before Christmas eve”.

Christmas, the day I’d run underneath the tree, wanna see how many gifts you had for me, but you said “please my little princess check your socks I think Santa dropped by last night”.

Christmas gifts from you were mostly made up of toys and clothes and I would be disappointed somehow for I want something else, then you’d say “please my little princess check what Santa had for you”.

my giant sock hanging on windowpane was filled with books coloring materials, then you said and smiled “please my little princess go check carefully if these were exactly what you asked from Santa”.

on my 12th Christmas, I stopped hanging socks, you said: “please my little princess bear with Santa, he only drop gifts on the socks for little girls; he will have yours wrapped underneath the tree”.

on that same Christmas day, I run underneath the tree, the biggest and most beautiful box was for me; then you said “please my little princess read what the card has to say”.

on that Christmas day, Santa wrote, “this is the beginning of your gifts underneath the Christmas tree, you’re a big girl now my little princess, I will be your Santa forever”.

Christmas will never be the same without you dad….

 

 

When everything else fails

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When everything else fails

I will run away and sail at the

ocean so wide;

but I can’t, for you can’t

run away with me.

 

When everything else fails

I wanted to cry, cry till my tears

run dry;

but I can’t, for you can’t

cry along with me.

 

When everything else fails

I wanna shout out loud

till my lungs find its highest pitch;

but I can’t, for you can’t

shout out along with me.

 

When everything else fails

I sure will laugh it off,

laugh like tomorrow may not come;

but I can’t, for you can’t

laugh with me.

 

When everything else fails

I want you to hold me,

hold me so tight;

but I can’t, for you can’t

hold me anymore.

 

it’s been five years dad;

and I still miss you.

p.s.

It’s been a tough day…this is the moment when I wish I have my dad beside me saying ” everything will be fine”.

nothing beats my dad’s big hug….its comforting…

 

Lullaby

as the stars descent upon the dark sky

a lullaby can be heard

let the deliciously warmed milk

put you to sleep

and its scent put you to ease

with her gentle hand patting your soft hair

may you fall asleep with mother’s care.

p.s

a poem written by my 13 year old daughter. what do you guys think? let me know.

Thoughtfully

 

I slowly turned the lights

off…

A dwindling gesture of joy creeps in

A voice resounding within.

A desire is so strong to manifest.

I lie down in bed…

A hole appears from somewhere

In the middle of nowhere…

Taking my breath away.

I slowly close my eyes…

A view appears up there

Of a future farther…

Of myself steadier.

And I intensely breathe in…

Taking much more of reality

that…

the voice yells differently,

the hole leads to uncertainty,

the view tells insanity…

that…

one day my voice will be heard,

the hole won’t be empty,

and the view will be a sight…

a beautiful sight of what’s

within the real me.

 

P.S. a moment of coffee and me; a moment of peaceful solitude

I Miss YOU More

Oblivious of the time

and around;

I longed for your

hold so tight.

Your hold that keeps my steady

gaze in place;

your hold that once made a

better me.

Incognizant of how i felt

wanting how much of you

i can take.

I never imagined it would be

this dark without you,

the darkness that seemed to

topple down my soul

the darkness i once ignored

for you are there

holding closely as i fear.

It seems just a while,

but no, it’s really been a long while,

a really long while

since you walked away

unnoticed

It numbed my mind;

froze my heart.

I can’t take you out of

my life.

I need to touch you again.

I need to hold you close in

my arms.

I miss you that’s what

I wanna say.

I love you, I want you

to stay.

It’s been four years DAD!

Four years and I am mad..

‘cos i can’t have you back.

P.S.

In memory of my dad who passed away fours years ago.

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY DAD!!!

I Miss YOU More

Oblivious of the time

and around;

I longed for your

hold so tight.

Your hold that keeps my steady

gaze in place.

Your hold that once made

a better me.

Incognizant of how i felt,

wanting how much of you

i can take.

I never imagined it would be

this dark without you.

the darkness that seemed to

topple down my soul.

the darkness i once ignored

for you were there

holding closely as i fear.

It seems just a while,

but no..it’s really been a while

a long long while since you walked away

unnoticed.

It numbed my heart.

It froze my heart.

I can’t take you out of my life.

I need to touch you again.

I need to hold you close in my arms.

I miss you that’s what i wanna say.

I love you, I want you to stay.

It’s been four years DAD!

Four years and i am mad,

‘cos i can’t have you back.

P.S.

In loving memory of my father who passed away four years ago.

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY PAPA!!!