These Times

These Times

i would never forget the times
i am begging for you to stay
i am grateful for those times
you left me waiting; uncertain
i know how your heart breaks
more than mine
but that taught me
love’s greatest lesson
to look beyond what eyes can see
to feel loved beyond
hugs and kisses and warm embraces
especially at times when you are near me
yet a single glimpse is not possible
these times when love is love
regardless of and no matter what
these times when love is love
even if it felt like a glassful water
splashed, suspended in the air
not knowing when to fall
not knowing how to land
unbroken
unshattered
unhurt
these times.

For Sadje’s WDYS

Little Prince

Little Prince

i’ve always wanted a little prince who’d run around the house in glee
i’ve always wanted a boyish laugh that’d remind me how it is to have someone tough and strong defend you, willing to break their bone.

but i wonder what about the boys in a war-torn country
where they were forced to take arms and fight for freedom and equality
where they were forced to learn to pull the trigger instead of holding on to their mother’s loving arms?

then i wonder, how about the boys in the slums and streets
these boys lost in the loneliness and sadness of life’s harshest challenges
these boys lost in the shadows of what could have been’s and what if’s?

how about these boys with raw emotions and feelings and thoughts
how about these boys with dreams of becoming fine gentlemen someday
these boys with hopes of a better life, what about them?

then i pray for the little prince i could have had but went on to be somewhere else
lost in the battered pinnacle of their horrific dreams
endangered, nothing to hope for, nothing to dream.

i pray there won’t be any boys left in great danger.

for Sadje’s WDYS

A Bit of my Heart

A Bit of my Heart

can you hear the voice of my heart?
can you hear its cry and agony?
can you hear it screams your name?
your name. your name.

can you see the face of my heart?
can you see how lonely and empty it is?
can you see it longs for your smile?
your smile. your smile.

can you feel my heart?
can you feel  its sorrow and affliction?
can you feel how it yearns for your touch?
your touch. your touch.

i wonder did you even get to know my heart at all?
did you even get to understand how it beats of a hundred million love for you?
did you even realize how deeply it love you for years and years?

do you know even a bit of my heart?
i bet you don’t that’s why you left
and took on the easy way out.

Maze

Maze

it was a tiring journey
with winding roads
and crazy trails
it has tested my skills
my resilience
my conviction
and my strength.

it wasn’t easy at all
navigating was hard
much more overcoming
the unfamiliar trail
the strange highway
the journey to the
unknown was
daunting.

life raised me
for that
i found my way
my way out
of the maze.

life raised me.

Unannounced

Unannounced

how do i mend my broken heart?
my broken mind? my broken promise? my broken hope?
for everytime i look at my self in the mirror
i can’t help but see the brokenness in me.

that broken piece of me you took away
i don’t blame you for that though
but i must say i hated you for leaving me
just like that.

unannounced.

how dare you not give me the chance
the chance every human being deserve
the chance to say goodbye
the chance to watch you go.

but you went.

unannounced. unnoticed.
and i don’t know if i could ever
forgive myself or you, or the circumstances
sorrounding your departure.

it sucks.

it hurts.

it pains me so damn hard.
and i don’t know how to get over it.

you left me dad.
unannounced.
and i am broken

even decades after.

P.S.

Happy Birthday in heaven Papa💕

Answer

Answer

you asked me if I can still take it
if i can still carry on with all the pains
if i tell you i’m tired can you do anything?
can anything be changed?
i guess nothing.
nothing.

so let the wind blows my pain away
let the dark night swallow my worries
let time take all my heart aches
by then maybe just maybe
i will have the answer to your question.

for now let me love you
no questions asked
no hesitations
no compromises
just love
pure love.

Air

Air

i inhale silence
for it is the only kind of air
my lungs are familiar with
and i exhale indifference
for it is the only way
silence is expelled
out of my system
out of my body
then i hush myself
to sleep at night
with the hope
that tomorrow
a new kind of air
would breathe freely
thru my lungs

for Sadje’s WDYS

Mikaela

Day 25 of NaPoWriMo – Today’s (optional) prompt is based on the aisling, a poetic form that developed in Ireland. An aisling recounts a dream or vision featuring a woman who represents the land or country on/in which the poet lives, and who speaks to the poet about it. Today, I’d like to challenge you to write a poem that recounts a dream or vision, and in which a woman appears who represents or reflects the area in which you live. Perhaps she will be the Madonna of the Traffic Lights, or the Mysterious Spirit of Bus Stops. Or maybe you will be addressed by the Lost Lady of the Stony Coves. Whatever form your dream-visitor takes, happy writing!

For Sadje’s WDYS: https://lifeafter50forwomen.com/2022/04/25/what-do-you-see-131-april-252022/

Mikaela

i’ve never lost sight of you lately, in my dreams and in people i see
you’re the one thing my heart’s been crying for months now
with tears in my eyes i saw you walked me through my own childhood
the games that children play, to which i failed to do
’twas so fun seeing you skip and hop; shout and yell.

you were there too maybe when i was talking to a friend one afternoon
as i couldn’t get you off my mind, you keep coming out through my words
the things we would have done together, and the places we would have visited sooner
the friends and relatives you would have met around
would surely be happy and gay just by mere mention of you.

one night you showed me how your growing days would be
carefree and jolly, that’s how you want your days woud be
you walked me through the playground you wish to go
with the slides and the swing; you taught me to be play along
i swear i’d do everything just to keep you and see you smile all along
i swear i’d be keeping you company in all that you wanna do
i swear to be fun around.

i never lost sight of you and i never i wanted to, for i got your name
tattoed in my heart, in my mind and in my soul
you will be loved and remembered wherever you are
just promise me, you visit me always in my dream
show me places you’ve been to, show me things you’ve done.

make me the happiest by witnessing you become the wonderful woman i’ve always thought you’d be
losing you is tantamount to losing one pontentially good human being
come back anytime soon let’s read my favorite childhood books
let’s master multiple wordgames or we could play hide and seek; a game mama failed to do as a child.

but first let me start by calling you Mikaela, which means “one who is like God”.

Five Haikus

NaPoWriMo Day 18 Today, I’d like to challenge you to write your own poem that provides five answers to the same question – without ever specifically identifying the question that is being answered.

Five Haikus

I. just drop everything
take a deep and solemn breath
relax find your strength

II. it is essential
to strengthen your inner core
this balances you

III. close your eyes inhale
count one to ten hold your breath
eyes open exhale

IV. find your inner self
meditate as you relax
journey with your soul

V. the power is you
the courage is within you
search and go for it

Also for Sadje’s WDYS (https://lifeafter50forwomen.com/2022/04/18/what-do-you-see-130-18-april-2022/)