“and when this is all over, i hope to hold your hand, kiss you around and see you smile”
i long for the days when friends are source of love and inspiration and all sorts of measures those times when people are out of the street unmindful of what’s happening and what’s scares a bit
i long for the days when friends witness each other’s smiles the smiles and laughters we have forgotten for a while those moments when we truly see how delightful people can be is now sadly hidden behind a fashionable mask to see
i long for the days when hugs don’t freak anyone around when kisses are manifestation of undying love to hold those gestures that made us more human those love language we surely miss a lot this time
I never realized my story would end before it could even begin.
I silently wished to make it through. I actually have been praying so hard. And, I tried to be so good too. When I was told to behave, I did. When I was told to hang on, I did. When I was told hope, I did. I prayed so hard. I behaved so well. I held on tightly. I hoped (even when hope was not an option).
I was that “little bleep” screaming silently, wanting to see the world outside. I was a witness to how love survived all odds. Oh, geez I’ve witnessed the two most annoying human beings for wanting to get rid of each other, and yet not even one of them wanted to say goodbye first. How funny and stupid could that be? But well, at the end of the day, I hear them speak of love (so much love ) for each other. I hear them talk of their future and their plans. And, the most exciting part, I hear them discuss their plans for me.
I got so excited myself too.
I can’t wait. I really can’t wait.
Until today. Someone might have pulled the plug (or is there any plug at all?) I slowly and suddenly lost control of my breathing. It became so hard to breathe. I became so dark. It became so silent. Then I heard one heartbreaking confirmation “I’m sorry, we’ve lost it” Oh, how my heartaches. Damn! I wanted to be out so bad. But hey, my heart aches for my mom who was weeping alone, alone in the corner, with no one, nobody. I cried myself too. Then I wondered how would dad feel too?
I would really want to see the world outside. Live a beautiful life. Dream a dream and make a difference.
There was silence. There was total darkness. I see nothing. I hear nothing.
I wonder how each unborn child would be when they grow up if only they were lucky enough to make it out in this world. They could be our future best world leaders, future best scientists, future best directors, future best poets.
For women who know they’re pregnant, about 10 to 15 in 100 pregnancies (10 to 15 percent) end in miscarriage. Most miscarriages happen in the first trimester before the 12th week of pregnancy. Miscarriage in the second trimester (between 13 and 19 weeks) happens in 1 to 5 in 100 (1 to 5 percent) pregnancies.
“and what about the damage it caused me, I have to live with it my whole life?” This is what I would want to say. But no! I chose not to speak. I chose not to say a word. For what good would it bring if I speak when no one listens? No one understands? So, calmly, I gather myself up and take it from the start. From the bottom; me and my silent screams. I’m better off that way.
People believed you are in pain only when they see you bleeding. But not all pains have been cinematic and melodramatic.
It’s the silent scream that’s most painful of all.
And that’s why sometimes i wonder “can i just trade life with this little cute furry kitten, enjoying life with no complications?….just for once… for once…because i am really tired… ‘nakakapagod na’ [it’s tiring]”
“I don’t wanna wait for December because every day with you is Christmas you are my Christmas magic.”
Every day with you is new and exciting and mysterious. There is color everywhere red, green, gold, the world is eye candy.
Love, passion, and romance, and there are aplenty everywhere. Couple this with decorations like snowflakes and glittery stars, and it just makes me feel like grabbing your hand.
Lovingly throwing snowballs at each other and making snow angels while star-gazing is indeed a romantic dream. We’ll have to go overseas for this one, or head to a nearby Snow City, or maybe no need at all, we can just revisit our inner child and have a pillow fight instead.
So, baby just sit beside me, let’s build our Christmas tree and fill it up with lights and gifts and decors, then sing me a Christmas carol.
I just want you for my own More than you could ever know Make my wish come true Baby, all I want for Christmas is you
I don’t wanna wait for Christmas magic, let’s make it happen.
Your love is my Christmas magic and it is my security blanket.
Nothing can harm me nor anyone can destroy me. Your love is what fills me in, and I am every day in the comfort and security of your loving arms.
So, I don’t wanna wait for December and I don’t wanna wait for Christmas to say “you are the best Christmas present ever”, then maybe we can kiss under our make–believed mistletoe.